Things That Must Go

In X-96 fashion, MY LIST of things that MUST GO:

Vague Facebook posts. Like when people just write how they are feeling. "I'm pissed!" or "Lost and Confused" or "I can't believe that just happened to me". Sure we all like observing a little drama or juicy piece of gossip every once in awhile (Why are reality television shows so popular?) BUT If you are having these feeling and aren't going to elaborate on them, then maybe you should go talk to your Mom or best friend or something. Don't let the people that you knew and haven't seen since high school that you are lost and confused. Because frankly we probably don't care...

The name NEVAEH. Ya it's heaven backwards and sounds somewhat normal. But guess what? You aren't being creative. I'm pretty sure this name is becoming as popular as Brooke or Olivia. And if it is so cool to have names of words spelled backwards how com there are no EPOH's (hope) or EVOL's (love). Oh ya because they sound ridiculous. (and Evol sounds like evil.... hmmmm) In addition, I tend to see the Nevaeh's from the NICU that are typically the screamers. Not a fan.

The Terrible Two's. (or in my case the terrible 18 months) Pretty sure Max has selective hearing. Not sure if it is a two year old thing or a Male thing (because Chris suffers from the same problem). He doesn't listen, he gets ENCOURAGED when he does something naughty like it's a fun game, and if he doesn't get what he wants he cries and cries. I know it is part of his development and it is only going to get worse, but I'm ready to be done with it.

My iPhone. It's slow, the apps crash, it freezes, it takes F o r e v e r   to load, it shuts off whenever it wants, buttons are falling off, it has cracks, Max likes to suck on it (that probably doesn't help it's functioning), it is 3 years old and I'm ready to lay it to rest. Just waiting to see if the iPhone 5 is worth it of if I will be converting to the Droid.

Headaches. Especially the one's that linger for days. Really, cant you quit hurting?

The Hot weather. I am sick of sweating all the time. I'm sick of getting in my car and wanting to die. I'm sick of taking Max to the park, only to bring him home 20 minutes later because he is flushed and I'm worried he will overheat. In a state that experiences temperatures anywhere from 0-100 degree's you would think we could have a couple of weeks of 70 degree temperatures. But no. We go from 50 degree June to 90+ degree July and August. Where is my nice weather?!?! Here's to hoping for this fall...

BYU fans that truly HATE the U. Sorry, but I don't hate the Y. I think it is a good program, a good school, I know some great people that are BYU fans and I love them. I understand the rivalry and I do stand by my Utes and even make some comments during rivalry week. But come on. The people that root for EVERY team that plays against the Utes. I don't do that. Then when BYU plays some really good team and wins they say "In your face Utah". Like somehow that proves that they are better than Utah WHEN THEY DIDN'T EVEN PLAY UTAH. Whatever. I just roll my eyes. (And I love you all my Y Fan friends!)

Thank You a la Jimmy Fallon

This video had me rolling! I love Jimmy Fallon's "Thank You Notes". Hilarious!

Thank You Notes, Jude Law, Abby Elliott, & Christmas Sweaters

This inspired me to think of all the things that I am thankful for. So in the spirit of Jimmy Fallon I would like to write my Thank You notes.

Thank You Angry Holiday Shoppers,

For truly bringing the holiday spirit to all those around you. You really inspire others to be full of Christmas Cheer. And thank you for turning left in front of me in the Mall parking lot, even though I had the right of way. And for honking your horn in anger like I was in the wrong when I tried to turn right before you, scaring me half to death. It really made me want to burst into holiday song. Merry freaking Christmas!

Thank You Junk E-mail,

For cluttering up my emails so severely that if I don't check my e-mail for a week, I will have over 200 new emails. I really love spending the time deleting each one and probably missing out on an important ones in the process. It is probably my favorite pass time.

Thank You Regular Junk Mail,

For cluttering up my real mailbox. I love looking at ads of stores that I never shop at and catalogs that I have not purchased from in over 3 years. And for taking up so much space that I have missed important mail such as bills and jury duty. I am so glad you were sent to me so I could fill up land fields with your uselessness.

Thank You Squished Bladder,

For waking me up in the middle of the night. I love spending the next hour trying to get back to sleep. And Thank You for giving me that wonderful feeling of urgency every time I stand up. It is so nice to need to run to the bathroom all the time. I really am looking forward to the time when I will become incontinent every time I laugh, cough, and sneeze.

Thank You Sciatic Nerve,

For the shooting pain you send down my leg. I love limping. It really adds to the "waddle" I already have.

Thank You Dry Eyes,

For making it nearly impossible to wear my contacts for more than 6 hours. I really love wearing my 5 year old glasses that I can barely see out of. And thank you Costco lady for the lecture on not spending money on new glasses because I am pregnant, even though I already talked to my ophthalmologist about it (AND HE GAVE ME A NEW PRESCRIPTION). I really think you know more than him. I guess not seeing is just another part of being pregnant.

Thank You Laundry,

For never being entirely done. Even if my entire house is clean, I know the vary clothes I am wearing is just another chore waiting to be done. And thank you dryer for never getting my clothes dry enough so I have to run two cycles. Just what I wanted to do ALL DAY LONG.... laundry.

Thank You Left-overs,

For being entirely gross. Why do I save you? I don't want to be wasteful, but I will not eat you. I didn't even like you that much when you were fresh. I am just creating more work for myself when I throw you away in a week and have to clean all my Tupperware. Plus you occasionally grow things that make me want to hurl. Should of just gotten rid of you in the first place!

And Thank You Jimmy Fallon... for giving me an outlet to vent!

Another Unrealistic "Reality" Show Ends.

Dear Jason -

Were you completely honest? Did you really follow your heart and your head?

Because I don't think you said it enough on "After the Final Rose" last night.

Standby Flying Sucks

STANDBY FLYING IS NOT FOR THE WEAK OF HEART!

Chris works for an airline, so he has flight "benefits" ("Flight benee's" as Chris calls them). I use the term "benefits" loosely, because they are hardly that. Although, they have helped us to fly to places we otherwise normally couldn't afford... it is definitely at the cost of your sanity.

Two weeks ago my cousin and her husband decided they wanted to fly to Hawaii out of LA on standby with his "benefits". Originally I told them no, because Chris is busy with school and I didn't have work off. However, I traded a shift at work and all of the sudden did have the time off. Chris still wanted to work on school since his final are fast approaching (He is a smart boy!). But I had time off. So, I thought, "Maybe I should go." My cousin had reserved a Condo, so I asked her if I could still go, and she said sure!

On Monday, flights looked great for Thursday. There were a good amount of seats on the plane and we were high up on the standby list.

But slowly... as the past 3 days unfolded... More and more seats were sold and more and more standby people started listing. (Who buys a FIRST CLASS ticket to Hawaii the day before?!?... because 6 people did! Guess not everyone is as effected by the economy...) And to the people who list their standby seats last minute... thanks a lot for screwing over the little newbies. If you have planned on flying standby for the last month... please don't list your family of 7 the day before and shatter the dreams, plans, and pocket books of the people with less seniority who have made hotel arrangements and rental car arrangements at the said destination. Because you really are screwing us! (Some people have a 1965 seniority date and list themselves as they are driving to the airport.) All I ask, is if you are planning on flying... list early, so others don't make arrangements and have to eat all that cost.

Anyway, we didn't make it on our flight today. After waiting and hoping, we were denied. I have looked at the standby list so frequently over the past few days that I think I am developing OCD! I obsess about the flights and as soon as I act on the compulsion to check on the status, I get irritable. So I try to not look at them, but I OBSESS. Vicious cycle. Not to mention I worked a night shift so my sleep schedule is totally off. This sucks!

We are going to try the flight tomorrow. So everyone wish us luck! But, I am definitely pessimistic...

I think that Standby Flying should come with a warning from the Surgeon General:

* Warning: Standby Flying may cause anxiety, fear, cold sweats, nausea/vomiting, diarrhea/nervous stomach, irritability, anger, frustration, obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), impatience, crushed hopes, shattered dreams, sadness, depression, insanity, and insomnia.

(some "benefits")

Thought of the Day

You know... You never realize how many steps you take in a day...

Until you wear devil shoes.

Karma

I decided I am a true believer of Karma. Good and Bad. What goes around, comes around. You get out of life what you put into it.

Of course, when I decided to become a nurse, I knew that I would have to work long hours, weekends, and holidays. I could work in a clinic Monday-Friday 8-5 and have all my hard work in nursing school and experience I have acquired since dwindle away into the mundane routine of taking vital signs and medical history's. I wanted to be a hospital nurse to keep up on my skills.

So I knew when I started at my job that I would have to give up some of my traditions and holiday practices to be at work. They told me, before they hired me that I would be working Christmas that year. They require us to work a Christmas shift every OTHER year.

However, because my unit did not hire anyone the year after I started working, I had to work Christmas for 3 years in a row. I was bitter about it. But I just kept trucking along. (When you are a nurse at Primary Children's... your seniority is EVERYTHING!)

Then last year, my first year to have Christmas off, I worked Thanksgiving and had a horrendous day! A clinic job was looking better and better by the moment!

Well, I guess my good Karma finally came. Because I got a sneak peak at the holiday schedule and found out I am working on Christmas day, but at night, and only for 1/2 a shift and then New Years Eve. So I get all of Thanksgiving, and most of Christmas off. This is a pretty good holiday schedule for some one who has worked on the unit for a little more than 4 years.

So if you ever have felt like you have been dealt a bad hand in life, or are getting screwed somehow, don't worry. Good Karma will come. Sometimes you just have to be patient.

P.S. a little side note. I also recently found out that 3 of my ex-boyfriends who broke up with amazing me (2 who crushed my heart) are now divorced. Karma baby!

I must be an Anti-Dentite

I remember reading somewhere that Dentist have the highest suicide rate of any profession. Really? Dentists? I mean they make lots of money, have dream hours (8-4, Tuesday-Friday or Monday-Thursday), and get to have dental hygienists do a lot of the dirty work. They just have to poke at some teeth and tell you whether it is good or needs to be drilled/crowned/root canal'ed.

So why the high suicide rate?

Hmm... maybe it is because everyone hates the dentist?

Most people associate pain and discomfort with the dentist. When you arrive at the exact time your appointment is, you ALWAYS end up in the waiting room. Even if, strangely, there is no one else waiting. Then you sit in a chair and have your teeth cleaned (miserable) as the dental hygienist lectures you that you should be flossing like 3 times a day (Ya right!) then the dentist comes in and inspects your teeth. Then you have to COME BACK to get more work done if there is problems. He is involved with bad news, shots, and drilling. PAIN PAIN PAIN.

So some people stay away for a while (Long time in Chris's case)

Then when you return with a massive toothache the dentist gives you really bad news, causes MORE pain, and then bleeds you dry with an insane bill. No wonder. It is depressing for all parties.

(Did you figure out we just got Chris's bill?)

However, WE will continue to go... because we can't afford not to!

By the way... dental insurance is a joke. Thanks a lot for covering $40 of my crazy expensive bill. Glad I pay you regularly, every paycheck, for $40 and some teeth cleanings...

Worst Movies

The other day Chris and I were talking about movies. He had mentioned a particular movie that I absolutely hated. That got me thinking about the worst movies that I have ever witnessed. And I thought of my top 5. I know some movies are lame, but these are movies I wish I hadn't wasted my time on.


So here are the Top 5 Worst Movies I Have Ever Witnessed:


5. The Grudge- Ok. I was a little scared. But when it was all over, I asked myself why? I liked The Ring because it had high creepy factor. I like creepy scary that makes you jump, not guts and gore, or just plane dumb. Long, boring, LAME!


4. Vanilla Sky - Dreadful show. The person who dreamt up it's theme and script had to be on some sort of illegal substance. It was creepy stalkerish with a psychotic twist. It has been so long now... all I can remember is despising it from the first 20 minutes. However, I couldn't leave because my Aunt had picked it for our annual Thanksgiving Day Movie and she was the one who drove. Plus we were in some theater in O-Town (Ogden).


3. The Village - An M. Night Shyamalan production. I liked Unbreakable and Signs. I even didn't mind the Sixth Sense. So I thought this movie would be good, because I can appreciate a good twist. But this movie... the twist made you feel like you got the short end of the stick. I can't believe I wasted 2ish hours of my life for the ending! You kept thinking, ok it will get better. But nope. The whole show was long and ridiculous. When I was in the theater, as it ended and the credits started rolling, my cousin shouted, "LAME!" I started laughing because that is exactly how I felt! We have an ongoing joke between us that when you feel like you got screwed you say, "I just got M. Night'ed!". I could never bring myself to see Lady in the Water or The Happening after that!


2. Pulp Fiction - I saw this movie because it was free on our on demand cable and Chris said he always wanted to see it. So I gave in. Why oh why? It was just an excuse to have gore ridden murders, drugs of all sorts, and Mobsters. All I remember really is that I have never heard the F bomb used so much in my life! Oh and did I mention it didn't make any sense. If it had a deeper meaning, I sure didn't get it. Oh, and I don't really like John Travolta anyway. Maybe in Grease....maybe.


1. Solaris - The one that takes the cake. This was another pick by my Aunt for our Thanksgiving Day Movie (She was on a roll). She wanted to see it because it promised George Clooney's butt. I didn't know what was going on from the beginning! It was Sci-fi flick, I got sick half way through and missed about 30 min of the show, then returned to utter confusion. Nobody knew what was going on! What a waste of time, money, and George Clooney! I know....you have probably never heard it before. But don't bother. Not even if you are curious.


What is the all time worst movie you have ever seen?


Go ahead. Think about it. I only had a day, so I may think of more...


P.S. When finding the links to the IMDb of these films, I found it interesting that some of these films got great ratings. Guess I just didn't get it? But from my perspective they were horrible!

Bad Day....with a Saving Grace

You know you have had a bad day when:

*It starts out by waking up at 5:50 AM

*You go to work

*You have issues/problems right off the bat

*You continue to have issues/problems throughout the day

*You have anxious customers that become angry when there are communication issues. (In my case patients parents)

*You spend oodles of time correcting these problems, listening to them vent, helping them feel validated. Putting their needs above yours.

*You don't have a morsel to eat or a drop to drink until 5:15 PM

*You come home exhausted... knowing when you return to work in the morning, you will have a whole new day with the same customers (patients and their parents for me)

That is pretty much how my day went. Lots of fun. My saving grace? The Lord has been thinking of me. He blessed me by encouraged the Udot people to re-pave 33rd south from 700 W to the freeway. Pot hole hell has now turned into smooth road heaven. Yay!

Just needed a little venting session.

I Love/Hate Walmart

I have a Love/Hate relationship with Walmart. I love the cheap prices (for the most part), and I love to hate it. It seems every time I go there I am constantly reminded of why I never want to go there again, and yet...I keep going back. I can't help myself.

I know that Walmart has some shady practices of how they are able to sell products at such low prices. So I've heard through the grape vine at least. However, I am not educated in this subject because I haven't watched the Walmart documentary or read anything on this matter in particular. Sometimes I wonder if it would really matter if I did. I mean, I watched Super Size Me and vowed never to eat fast food again. It worked for about a week. Then it stopped working. I guess I wasn't horrified enough to stay away from fast food. I still eat McDonald's on occasion.

Low prices..... but at what cost?

I wish I was talking about the underpaid and under-benefited employees. But I am talking about going to Walmart to get laundry detergent that is $3 cheaper then at the other grocery store I shop at. But, then I turn around and $5 this and that on crap I probably don't need. I mean it's only $5. But pretty soon lots of $5 items add up and I end up spending way more then I probably would have just going to my regular grocery store. So I actually would have saved my money if I just would have gone to the other store. Sure I have great $8 volumizing curlers now. But I wouldn't have even had the knowledge they existed (therefore not know what I was missing) if I hadn't gone to Walmart in the first place.

Sigh!

Here is a list of why I hate Walmart:

1. I spend more money then I plan on. Oh it's only $2?...better buy 2 or 3.

2. The parking lot. It is always full of SLOW people, crazy drivers, and runaway carts.

3. The lines. Even if the line looks short someone is holding it up by paying for their bill with 3 different sources of money. It is a guaranteed 20 minute wait.

4. The produce. This is mainly why I don't shop at Walmart regularly. I have had fruit that never ripens just rots, flies found in my romaine lettuce, and strawberries that go bad the next day. Where are they getting this stuff?

5. Asking a question to staff and have them look at you and shake their head. No comprende?

6. Feeling like you fit in with the general population when you have rolled out of bed, put on a pair of flip flops, and ran out the door. If you have gotten ready at all, you feel over dressed.

7. Clean-up on aisle 4 never seems to get attended to.

Here is a list of why I love it:

1. Low Prices

2....

Hmmmmmm

You would think I would learn. Sad thing is, in a few weeks I will forget. And the next time I need some deodorant, or toilet wand refills, or Q-tips, or jasmine rice... You will probably find me at the local Walmart.

Wasn't Quite the Same

Traditionally, my Dad's side of the family goes to my Grandpa's Cabin every year for Memorial Day and Labor Day. We usually go the Sunday before, stay up late playing games and talking, sleep overnight, and then wake up to the best breakfast feast with my Grandpa's famous delicious pancakes. I have missed out the past couple of years because I usually have to work. However, I lucked out this year and they gave me Labor Day off.

After watching the weather forecast, I knew it would be rainy. Nearly every Memorial Day is wet so this wasn't going to put a damper on things. I just packed my clothes that could get muddy in case we decided to go on the ATVs. (Although I am sort of against them since there are so many accidents that end up at my work.)

So we drove the 1.5 hours up there and it was a nice day...sunny, almost a little too warm. We set out the table and started getting ready for dinner. As we were grilling our steaks, the clouds started rolling in and it started to sprinkle.

Then it started to rain....and then it started to POUR. So we hurried and finished up using the grill and sought shelter in the cabin. Then something happened that none of us anticipated...

The power went out.

Now, I know that man has survived many thousands of years without electricity. But we were very ill prepared. There was not a candle in the entire place. And the only flashlights we had were emergency ones from peoples cars that were nearly out of batteries. So we were all using the lights of our cell phones and ipods to stumble around the cabin. It was still raining so bad, and I believe that we all had hope that it would somehow turn on by the morning so that my Grandpa could make us his incredible pancakes. So we didn't really think about the possibility of leaving.

After sitting around talking for awhile we decided to turn in for the night. Everyone slept horrible! It rained most of the night and someone got up to go to the bathroom at least every hour. Since it was dark, each bathroom breaker made loud noises stumbling around in the dark. AND, after I woke up with each of them it took me about 15-20 minutes to get back to sleep.

We awoke very tired and sad. The power had not miraculously turned on during the night. My Grandma was devastated. She was trying to find a way to be able to cook the breakfast. We all finally decided to go to my Grandparents house (about 30 min away) to eat the famous breakfast. It was delicious, but not quite the same. There is nothing like eating Grandpa's Pancakes with the trees all around you and the smell of truly fresh forest air.

Oh well....Happy Labor Day anyway.

Limes

I guess when life throws you lemons it throws you limes too.

Speaking of Limes.... I was at the grocery store on Monday and I frequently buy limes for cooking. They were on sale 10 for $1 which was a crazy good price since they are usually 3 or 4 for $1. Well I know why now....



The lime on the left is one I bought about a week ago 4 for $1. The limes on the right were the 10 for $1 limes. They look like they were shrunk in the wash or came from munchkin land. Not much larger then a quarter. I was standing in the aisle in disbelief. I bought them just to show Chris how ridiculously small they were.

Anyway, we have had more challenges this week. If it weren't enough that Chris was sick with a cold, had a big project for school, had to get his teeth drilled with a temporary crown in place, and had to miss out on family vacation last week.... This week he had an allergic reaction to the amoxicillin they put him on for his painful tooth. He has hives covering his entire body except his face. They are even on the palms of his hands and feet. Poor guy! We had to take him to the Instacare to see the Doc and get a steroid to help the reaction. So now he can't sleep, is grumpy (the steroids give him mood swings), and is still itching all over. In addition, it is his finals week. I don't know what to do for my poor hubby. He has really gone through the ringer these past couple of weeks. I just pray that nothing else happens because I don't know if he (or I) can take it!

We need some limeade.... preferably a Cherry Limeade from Sonic....mmmmmm

When Life Throws You Lemons

Throw them back at life?

Get over it?

Make Lemonade?

What ever conclusion you come to, life happens. And it usually happens when you are making other plans.

Chris and I have overcome lots of obstacles to try to go on a vacation with my family. Whether it is school, work, illness, stress, mandatory training, or stand-by flying. We have overcome a lot to make it possible.

And then LIFE happened.

Chris got a toothache at 2:00 AM. He is already fighting a cold, as well as stress with finals coming. But he gets a toothache and can't sleep. Then next morning he tells me he has a horrid toothache. Oh crap is all I can think. We are supposed to leave tomorrow for our vacation! He starts looking up home remedies for toothaches on the Internet. I tell him he needs to see a dentist. I know it has been awhile since he hasn't gone to one since we have been married, even though I have been telling/nagging him to. So I finally convince him to go to the dentist.

And what do they find? Let's just say that it involves words such as antibiotics, lortab, cavities, crowns, and a root canal. They will get him in as soon as possible. He is guaranteed a Monday appointment, but they will call him if they have any cancellations to get him in sooner. The Dentist makes it sound pretty important that he get it taken care of soon.

My hopes of him going on vacation with my family shattered. After all the obstacles we had overcame. It wasn't going to happen. Upset at the state of his teeth, the amount of money, and nursing time I will have to do, I was angry. I had to call my Mom in fear that her heart would be broken. But she was very understanding. She is always good to me when I have a breakdown.

BUT, I am still going. I guess that is the lemonade of the situation. Chris will have to nurse his tooth at home awaiting an appointment while I'm in Sunny CA. That's what he has to endure for not going to the dentist for 5+ years. Let this be a lesson to all.

I'm Not in "The Club"

So yesterday Chris and I went to hang out and have dinner with some of his old friends from high school because one of them was in town (it's been a nostalgic week). It is always sort of awkward in these types of situations because you have maybe only met these people at your wedding.... or theirs. And maybe only a couple other times.

Anyway, so Chris is laughing and reminiscing with his friends and wife A and wife B both have little children who they are giving their undivided attention too. So I am sitting there with my drink and the appetizers listening to Chris and his friends stories and just feeling out of place. At one point, even Chris said, "Man we will have to have a kid soon to fit in with this group." While I do want kids eventually, I don't have any now and I am tired of feeling awkward or ignored because I don't.

But I guess we all feel this way at one point. When your little and considered uncool (who decides anyway?) you might not be a part of the "popular/cool club". When you are single and not dating anyone you aren't a part of the "boyfriend club". Which means you aren't invited with your dating friends anywhere unless you are willing to be a third wheel. When your single and not married by the age of 21 (in Utah) you are practically an old maid. So by 21 your out of place by not being a part of the "married club". Well I'm not a part of the "Mom club".

However, the night did improve because little ones had to go to bed and I could carry on a conversation without someone being distracted by children. I was able to talk with Wife A and she was very down to earth and we had a great conversation. I understand that when you have children they do consume your entire life and so there is not much else you can do or talk about. I will probably be the same way when I have kids. I just dislike going to an already sort of awkward situation where I am the only one not in "the club".

*By the way, shout out to Kristina! I won an Us Weekly magazine subscription from her blog! I can drown my sorrows with celeb gossip!

MY List of Things That Must Go!

So I was driving home from work after a long day, frustrated and tired, and came up with a list of things that must go. I listen to X-96 frequently and since I work either 7am to 7pm or 7pm to 7am I usually catch the Radio From Hell show either coming to or going from work. This is one of my favorite things they do and always end up laughing out loud in my car or making comments ("amen sister" or "get over it") So here it is....


#1 - I-80 construction. This is the way I drive to work. It has been under construction for over a year with what looks like little to no progress in my opinion (oooh they put a new bridge above 1/2 of 7th east). Semi's are supposed to detour on 2-15, but they go flying down miniature sized lanes over bump after bump of uneven road. My hands always tense up when I am driving because it looks like the semi's going to bounce right into my lane on top of my little car. Oh and I wonder if UDOT would pay for a windshield replacement for the 4 large rock chips and long crack across my windshield.


#2 - 33rd South. Also on my way to and from work. They are laying pipes under the road or something which also has had little progress over the past months. AND it is like off roading/four wheeling on the road because there are so many pot holes. Where I turn left the whole turn arrow painted in the road is one huge pot hole. I am sure my alignment is off and that I will get a flat tire real soon. Just pave a new road already!


#3 - Taking care of toddlers- When I started at my job, we took patients 12 months and younger. I would get the occasional 11 month old that hated me, but it was do-able. Well recently they upped the age on our unit to 2 years! You thought the terrible two's were bad! Try hooking them up to an oxygen cannula, IV fluids, and a monitor. Plus they are sick so they are puking, pooping, and/or getting snot everywhere. And don't even think about putting a (gasp) stethoscope on their chest. They scream/cry when you walk in the door and you haven't even started doing the task that is going to make them scream and cry. They want to crawl all over the dirty hospital floor, and when you try to stop them....temper tantrum! I will take a 2 month old that cries when you bug them, but easily calms when they are wrapped up with their Binky, over that ANY DAY!


#4 - Bad/Mean/Inconsiderate/Impatient Utah drivers. Hey...I want to get to work/home/Smiths/a restaurant/the Mall just as fast as you do! So don't go flying past me and then cut me off when I am already going 5-10 over the speed limit! And please don't come to a complete stop when you are turning right onto a road and I am going straight. I understand that you need to slow down, but seriously? It took my little put-put car at least 20 sec to speed back up to normal speed making the lame guy behind me slow down drastically, get irritated, change lanes, and speed past me (It wasn't my fault!).


#5 - New residents in July/August. Bless your hearts, but I am sorry I have to call you in the middle of the night and or four times a day because you forgot to sign your orders/didn't assign the patient a pediatric team/forgot to write for IV fluids/Didn't put a dose in mg on that medication/question my knowledge/ect...ect...ect. BELIEVE me I would write the order myself if I could, but no....I have to get your permission.


Not to sound like a complainer or anything... but I did have a frustrating day! (I took care of 2 toddlers!)

That Darn Cat

So we love our cats...but we have a problem. They love to chew/shred the toilet paper. Especially Squeakers. I am not sure what to do to remedy the issue. Even if I lock them out of our bathroom, their cat box is in the guest bathroom, and our guest need toilet paper! So anyway, I came home after a long day at work to find this....

I have seen little bites here and shreds there. But half of this brand new roll is rendered useless. There is a complete canyon of bites right in the center. Toilet paper confetti. What am I to do?

(Ya sure... look all innocent Squeakers...I know it was you!)

......And don't even get me started on the chewed cords!

Jack of All Trades

So, yesterday at work, after being asked yet another random question that I felt had nothing to do with my job, I decided when you are a nurse you have to be a Jack of all trades. Like many jobs, you have to have a variety of knowledge and skills to complete your job. So I know I do not stand alone in this.

I remember awhile ago reading an email or card of some sort that had all the jobs a mother has to do like chauffeur, cook, maid, etc. So I was thinking of all the variety of occupations I feel like I have to do at work and I came up with a list of my own. So here it is!

Social Worker- While we do have Social Workers available during the day...over nights, weekend, and holidays there is just one for the entire hospital. And you wouldn't believe the amount of social issues we have to deal with on a day by day, hour by hour basis. Custody battles, divorce, separation, in-law arguments, arguments in the room, DCFS, etc. So I feel like I have to be a social worker frequently to diffuse situations.

Teacher- Teaching families is part of my job description as a nurse. But I not only have to teach them (Which can often be challenging) I have to teach the myriad of new staff we have hired this year. It has been challenging because it takes twice as long to do your tasks when you not only have to do it, but explain why you are doing it. I also have to teach new staff how to teach the families. I know it is necessary and important, that is why I do it. But it is definitely a challenge. Also, we have a new influx of resident and medical students that you have to worry about teaching how to look stuff up in the computer or use the phone.

Secretary - I answer phones, write orders, transfer phone calls, set up appointments, highlight, sign, paper work, paper work, paper work. If someone needs something, I have to know how to find it or who to call.

Maintenance - I of course don't have to do some of this stuff. But when you call clinical or mechanical engineering you could be waiting all day sometimes. When equipment breaks we have to write a big report about it in the computer and then tape it to the piece of equipment. At my old job we just had one maintenance guy and I would just tape a broken sign to it. AND If I had $5 for every time I was asked about why Channel such and such wasn't working, or was too loud, or they didn't know how the PlayStation worked to watch a DVD, or the VCR wasn't working....I might be able to drop to part time. And like yesterday when I was searching for a screw driver so I could put new batteries in a mobile to entertain my starving, awaiting surgery patient... I was willing to do it... but it isn't something you would expect to be doing as a nurse.

Psychic/Predictor - I have to be able to anticipate what is going to happen during the day. "When will the doctor be here?" "When are rounds?" "When will my baby's test/x-ray results be back?" "When is my child really going to have surgery...we were scheduled at 2:00, but now it is 3:30?" "When will we be able to go home?" (This is my favorite question, because it is the number one question asked to me when they first come up to the room after spending at least 6 hours in the Emergency Department. I just want to say "YOU JUST GOT HERE" but have to say, it all depends on how your baby is doing.) Also when you call a doctor to report an abnormal finding, you have to either suggest or anticipate the next order/step.

Middleman- I know this is not a real JOB, but I am constantly the middle man. If a doctor orders an MRI and the sedation nurse won't sedate the patient because they are on oxygen or have RSV, the sedation nurse calls me and tells me they won't do it. I in turn have to call the doctor to tell them that the sedation nurse refuses to do it and the resident has to tell the senior, etc. Same goes with the Laboratory, Pharmacy, and specialty teams. If you eliminate me and just talk to the doctor yourself, less time wasted (in my opinion).

So like a mother probably doesn't always love being a chauffeur, cook, maid, etc..... she loves being a mother and will do anything required to make her family happy. I am the same way. I don't always love all the tasks I have to do, but I love being a nurse and taking care of patients. So I am willing to do whatever it takes to make them happy.